Back in high school, a teacher reprimanded me for something trivial. His tone of voice, pointed energy, and air of authority created a reaction within me. Immediately my heart lurched, panic set in, and my stomach sank. Then I had the sensation of standing outside my body. My hands were tingly, and my energy moved up high in my head. I felt off for the rest of the day and walked on eggshells around that teacher for several weeks. Years later, I realized I had disassociated. My training in trauma work explained this experience.
If something happens around us that we perceive as a threat, our sympathetic nervous system reacts by flooding our body with cortisol from the adrenal glands, kicking off what is called the “fight or flight” response. Energy is drawn toward the torso, increasing heart rate and blood pressure, mobilizing the necessary resources to fight or run away. When the sympathetic nervous system engages, we have *more* energy in our body. Other signs of being in “fight or flight” mode are panic, fear, anxiety, worry, rage, anger, and frustration.
The threat that initially triggers the sympathetic nervous system may be physical, emotional, mental, or energetic. Even thinking about a frightening situation from the past might engage the “fight or flight” response. Anything that our system perceives as a threat will elicit the response.
If our natural instinct to fight or run away is thwarted, our parasympathetic nervous system engages. This activates the “freeze” response. Our body enters an emergency state and begins to store fuel for later use. When the parasympathetic nervous system engages, we have *less* energy in our body. Signs associated with being in “freeze” mode are disassociation, numbness, flat affect, depression, shame, and hopelessness. Physiologically, the body is preparing for death.
If we have repeated experience with the “fight or flight” response being unsuccessful, the central nervous system will go directly into the “freeze” response when triggered.
Hundreds of thousands of years of biological adaptation have led us here. Both the sympathetic and parasympathetic responses are natural mechanisms meant to ensure survival of the individual and the species.
But it’s not healthy to be activated all the time. Chronic stress creates illness.
The central nervous system is designed to return to its normal state after the threat has passed. This is referred to as “being in regulation” or having a regulated system. In regulation, the body relaxes and begins to use energy for functions such as digestion. This response is also known as the “rest and digest” system. When we’re in regulation our immune response increases, we have greater resistance to infection, and we are able to rest and recuperate. When our system is regulated, we can experience groundedness, presence, joy, compassion, and connection with others. In spiritual terms, when we are regulated we’re operating from our center.
Initial programming of the central nervous system happens in infancy and early childhood. Our nervous system attunes to those around us, so if our parents and caregivers had well-regulated systems, our first experiences in the world will be of a well-regulated system. If our parents and caregivers were often in fight, flight, or freeze, our nervous systems will adapt to that energy, and we will be less regulated.
In a nervous system that’s experienced many traumatic events, the smallest of triggers might move us into activation instantly, and it may take much longer to move back into regulation when the threat to our safety has passed.
It’s possible to support the central nervous system into coming back into greater balance and harmony. This happens slowly over time. In a body-based form of trauma work called Somatic Experiencing, the practitioner works together with the client to introduce the tiniest bit of activation into the system and then step away from the trigger and move back toward peace and calm. This gives the nervous system a chance to have a successful experience of deactivating and moving into safety and regulation. This cycle is known as a pendulation. Many gentle pendulations over time gradually create a more resilient nervous system.
Here are some tools that can support you in being more aware of nervous system activation and moving toward greater regulation:
* Be present with your body and its body sensations. Are you experiencing tingling, pressure, a change in temperature? When we notice what’s happening somatically, we can begin to decode what’s happening and care for our needs.
* Remember to breathe. Deep breathing can engage the “rest and digest” system and help move toward regulation.
* Look around your environment and orient yourself to time and place. Remind yourself of *where* you are and *when* you are. If we are triggered from an event in the past, this helps us remember that we are in the present – in this moment, that event is not happening to us.
* Bring to mind a loved one who is a source of support and allow your body to experience the ease that comes from your connection. This is known as resourcing. Our pets, spirit guides, Mother Earth, trees, and crystals (along with many other things) can also be resources. We’re not taking their energy, we’re feeling the connection.
* Notice a place of ease in the body and hold your attention there. As we observe, that sense of relaxation may extend into the places holding tension.
* Reach out for the support of others. Allow others to comfort you, particularly those with well-regulated nervous systems who feel safe. Just by being in their presence, you might attune to their groundedness and calm. This is called social engagement.
* Work with a Somatic Experiencing practitioner to give the central nervous system more experience with successfully returning to regulation after a trigger. Over time, this will develop a more resilient nervous system.
* Work with a shamanic healer to bring back missing soul pieces for a greater sense of wholeness and completeness.
As always, please be kind and gentle with yourself. If you have a history of trauma, there is support available. You might consider adding a trauma therapist or Somatic Experiencing practitioner to your care team.
This work is real, and it matters.
November 9, 2021